Feminism vs. Gender Roles: How I can believe in both
I am a fierce and passionate feminist. Let it be known that I am completely on board with women being considered equal to men.I also believe in gender roles, and cannot wait to fulfill my #1 goal of being a stay-at-home wife and mother. Believers in both ideas would call me a traitor or fence-sitter. I am about to tell you why I am not a walking contradiction (in this topic anyway).
I believe that gender roles are a stronghold for a stable community. Before anyone decides to get spicy, do I mean that a man cannot be a good cook or nurturer? Of course not! Do I mean a woman isn't capable of holding her own in an office or any workforce? Of course not! We are all capable of so many incredible things, each of us with unlimited potential. But each gender has intrinsic and divinely placed gifts, so we are each asked to lift where we stand by using the gifts we have to better the world around us. The Proclamation to the Family states: "Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose." Each gender has a purpose and role, and we are expected to fulfill it.
Now, does feminism oppose or support gender roles? Has it gone too far or not far enough? Both. Feminism's origin was to ensure that the female gender was considered equal to men- that women could vote, own property, answer for themselves, and not be a slave to their husband. That is a noble effort and hasn't gone far enough, because there are still women in other countries who are forced to wear veils, subjected to female castration, and other horrific atrocities. That feminism must persist and ring throughout the world, and men and women alike must unite to fight this problem. In this cause, I am now and will always be a feminist.
Feminism as it has mutated to refuting the need for men or for abortion as an easy out is wrong, and goes against everything we were ever meant to fight for. That feminism is destructive and tears down millions of others- men, children and even other women. We serve no one when we support that kind of feminism. That is an ugly tactic that results in stepping on others to raise ourselves higher. That's what Hitler did. That's what Satan does-rips down others while being focused on selfish desires. We are and can be better than that. We as women should set the example. How can we ever be considered fully equal if we treat men the same way we have been? Instead of barely skimming a low bar of behavior, why would we as women not want to be the first to strive for excellence, to push beyond the expectations and excel in ways that no one had ever imagined? Why can we not rise above the mediocrity of biting words to impress others with our determined but kind response to injustice? Can we not utilize our instinctive God-given gifts of love and nurturing to raise the bar in interacting with others?
Women-let this be your call to battle--battle injustice, battle abuse, battle insecurities, and most of all-battle any idea, program or habit that demeans your role, your worth, and your God, and do it in a Christ-like manner. Martin Luther King Jr. used a tactic in the war for Civil Rights that was not commonly accepted and seemed to go against reason-not fighting back in a harsh, abrasive manner. Many other methods had been tried before-they failed. Has feminism as we know it now worked? It has not. Let us reform our methods to a loving technique, and yes, the solution may come slower, but I think we will find a permanent change of immeasurable rewards instead of small successes won with dirty tactics. MLK Jr. put it beautifully when he said:
We as women have a natural ability to love and nurture and uplift. It seems like the farther we go into life, the more we get bumped and bruised and hurt. It's hard to not grow callous as we get jolted and rejected along the path of life. Sis. Margaret D. Nadauld made a wonderful statement to help us keep focus as we travel this life path: “The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity.” Let her cry be a call to greatness. We must search within ourselves to search for those qualities again, remove the callous skin and open ourselves up to others, to love and feel with the depth we did before we were burned. Others deserve the best in us, and I believe we will be happier as we clear the way to emotionally access us again.
Now gentlemen-Can you rise to the challenge as well? If there was ever a time that our world craves heroes, it is now. Why is Captain America such a favorite hero icon? Because of what he stands for-justice, righteousness, honor, respect for women, and a reverence for God! More than ever human kind seems to realize that we need men who are dependable, men who are chivalrous, men who stand up for their beliefs, men who righteously exercise their priesthood duties, men who fight like lions to protect those in need, men who provide for their families, men who are completely loyal to family, God, and country.
The Proclamation to the World defines a man's role in 3 ways: he is expected to provide, preside and protect. Providing is so much more than money: it is support for a hard-working & tired wife, it is a shoulder for your daughter to weep on when her heart is broken, it is a listening ear to your son who is struggling with an addiction. Presiding as the priesthood leader in your home, and being an active part of all that goes on in it, being responsible for the spiritual learning and heading up correction when needed for children. Protecting is a wonderful instinct men have that has a depth not yet recognized by others or perhaps even by yourself. This is not just physically, or in reference to your immediate family. Use your God-given instinct to defend all those around you-the weak, the bullied, the underdog, the abused. As a man, you can only truly love and care for women if you demonstrate it through fulfilling this role for them. This is a big charge laid at your feet gentleman, but you have such a gift of conquering the seemingly impossible.
We need each other. True joy comes from the relationships we have: with our spouse, with our children, with our neighbors, friends, coworkers, and with our God. Remember that every single one of us is a beloved child of the Living God, our loving Father in Heaven. No matter what reminds us to appreciate or treat each other better, be it feminism or gender roles, let us seek to uplift each other.
I believe that gender roles are a stronghold for a stable community. Before anyone decides to get spicy, do I mean that a man cannot be a good cook or nurturer? Of course not! Do I mean a woman isn't capable of holding her own in an office or any workforce? Of course not! We are all capable of so many incredible things, each of us with unlimited potential. But each gender has intrinsic and divinely placed gifts, so we are each asked to lift where we stand by using the gifts we have to better the world around us. The Proclamation to the Family states: "Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose." Each gender has a purpose and role, and we are expected to fulfill it.
Now, does feminism oppose or support gender roles? Has it gone too far or not far enough? Both. Feminism's origin was to ensure that the female gender was considered equal to men- that women could vote, own property, answer for themselves, and not be a slave to their husband. That is a noble effort and hasn't gone far enough, because there are still women in other countries who are forced to wear veils, subjected to female castration, and other horrific atrocities. That feminism must persist and ring throughout the world, and men and women alike must unite to fight this problem. In this cause, I am now and will always be a feminist.
Feminism as it has mutated to refuting the need for men or for abortion as an easy out is wrong, and goes against everything we were ever meant to fight for. That feminism is destructive and tears down millions of others- men, children and even other women. We serve no one when we support that kind of feminism. That is an ugly tactic that results in stepping on others to raise ourselves higher. That's what Hitler did. That's what Satan does-rips down others while being focused on selfish desires. We are and can be better than that. We as women should set the example. How can we ever be considered fully equal if we treat men the same way we have been? Instead of barely skimming a low bar of behavior, why would we as women not want to be the first to strive for excellence, to push beyond the expectations and excel in ways that no one had ever imagined? Why can we not rise above the mediocrity of biting words to impress others with our determined but kind response to injustice? Can we not utilize our instinctive God-given gifts of love and nurturing to raise the bar in interacting with others?
Women-let this be your call to battle--battle injustice, battle abuse, battle insecurities, and most of all-battle any idea, program or habit that demeans your role, your worth, and your God, and do it in a Christ-like manner. Martin Luther King Jr. used a tactic in the war for Civil Rights that was not commonly accepted and seemed to go against reason-not fighting back in a harsh, abrasive manner. Many other methods had been tried before-they failed. Has feminism as we know it now worked? It has not. Let us reform our methods to a loving technique, and yes, the solution may come slower, but I think we will find a permanent change of immeasurable rewards instead of small successes won with dirty tactics. MLK Jr. put it beautifully when he said:
We as women have a natural ability to love and nurture and uplift. It seems like the farther we go into life, the more we get bumped and bruised and hurt. It's hard to not grow callous as we get jolted and rejected along the path of life. Sis. Margaret D. Nadauld made a wonderful statement to help us keep focus as we travel this life path: “The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity.” Let her cry be a call to greatness. We must search within ourselves to search for those qualities again, remove the callous skin and open ourselves up to others, to love and feel with the depth we did before we were burned. Others deserve the best in us, and I believe we will be happier as we clear the way to emotionally access us again.
Now gentlemen-Can you rise to the challenge as well? If there was ever a time that our world craves heroes, it is now. Why is Captain America such a favorite hero icon? Because of what he stands for-justice, righteousness, honor, respect for women, and a reverence for God! More than ever human kind seems to realize that we need men who are dependable, men who are chivalrous, men who stand up for their beliefs, men who righteously exercise their priesthood duties, men who fight like lions to protect those in need, men who provide for their families, men who are completely loyal to family, God, and country.
The Proclamation to the World defines a man's role in 3 ways: he is expected to provide, preside and protect. Providing is so much more than money: it is support for a hard-working & tired wife, it is a shoulder for your daughter to weep on when her heart is broken, it is a listening ear to your son who is struggling with an addiction. Presiding as the priesthood leader in your home, and being an active part of all that goes on in it, being responsible for the spiritual learning and heading up correction when needed for children. Protecting is a wonderful instinct men have that has a depth not yet recognized by others or perhaps even by yourself. This is not just physically, or in reference to your immediate family. Use your God-given instinct to defend all those around you-the weak, the bullied, the underdog, the abused. As a man, you can only truly love and care for women if you demonstrate it through fulfilling this role for them. This is a big charge laid at your feet gentleman, but you have such a gift of conquering the seemingly impossible.
We need each other. True joy comes from the relationships we have: with our spouse, with our children, with our neighbors, friends, coworkers, and with our God. Remember that every single one of us is a beloved child of the Living God, our loving Father in Heaven. No matter what reminds us to appreciate or treat each other better, be it feminism or gender roles, let us seek to uplift each other.
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