Dimple's Discoveries

I have been afraid countless times. Unfortunately being afraid is not an emotion I lack. It's not uncommon for me to be on high alert as I walk in a dark alley, as I am home alone and hear a loud noise, or even when someone touches me unexpectedly. However, these momentary times when your heartbeat stops for a second are not the ones I am referring to. Tonight I will tell you about the time I felt true fear. We've all heard of it, and some, I'm sure, have already experienced it's cold and rough grip: The mind-stopping, heart racing, time-slowing fear that flows like ice through our veins and freezes us where we stand. This fear that can so quickly penetrate every cell of our bodies and souls can be paralyzing; a lesson I was soon to learn. I work in dangerous situations all the time with my line of work, both at the county jail and as an advocate. Perhaps I had become accustomed to the thought, or was incredibly naive about my work... either way I was not emotion...

My partner and I pull into a trailer park, spot the police cars and park near them, and notice the neighbors gathered outside talking quietly in circles, giving us wary looks. I don my 'Family Crisis Center' badge, grab my binder and we head to the trailer, as red and blue lights revolve intermittently on the outside walls of the trailer and on us. We knock and are let in by a police officer who proceeds to brief us on the situation: the husband started a verbal fight, and escalated to slamming his wife’s head into the fridge by holding a fistful of her hair, choking her son when he tried to intervene, and by threatening to kill her when he called from the jail asking for bail money. I sit on a dirty recliner listening to this woman cry out her frustration, her fears, and her despair. Her children sit nearby, quietly supporting her and occasionally rubbing her arm in an effort to console the inconsolable. Had her daughter not called the police, who called us, we might neve...

I have moved back to school, and am currently working as a Victim's Advocate at a Crisis Center, and yesterday I was privileged to be able to have a few hours to go serve there. I was helping to decorate some windows, and then my boss called me over and handed me a stack of files and asked me to do follow-ups. Follow ups with clients means that you go through their file, read all the history, incident reports, protection orders, etc. and then call the victim and ask how things are going, and then offer the services that they might need from us (ie: diapers, food, counseling, court advocacy, etc). I sat down and started reading. Some files had just one report, others had inches of reports from years past til now. Some were young, some were old, some were married for years, some had been dating a couple weeks. Some successfully left, some have since returned to the predator. Some had several children, some had none. All of these women were very different in many ways, but they ha...

This week has been busy with work at both jobs, and I have done something this week that I have never done before-stand up for myself. I have two patients, one at each facility, that have been extremely rude this week to our staff, screaming at the employees, refusing to let us do our job until they have things done in the order and at what particular time they want it, regardless of the other patients in the building or what time we are supposed to leave work. This can be exasperating for caregivers, and is unfair to us as we try to do our job to be treated in this manner. In all the years I've been working, I've never had the guts to stand up for myself, and I've stood in the room and allowed patients to yell at me and chew me out, to the point that I leave their rooms crying and can't go back in any more that shift as a result. I recognized this week as I heard one particular patient screaming at the nurse who was trying to give him insulin to manage his diabetes, ...

I have a hard time when people get angry at me. I can feel my body shutting down. My throat closes off, I can't think, and all I want to do is run. Although this is my first response, I have to quickly alter that reaction for my own safety and well-being, as well as for those around me. When patients get angry at caregivers, (which is a VERY common occurrence) we have to be ready for anything. I have been hit several times with different objects, had things thrown at me, let your imagination wander. Usually patients are frustrated when medication isn't functioning properly, whether they haven't had it or it isn't working, and staff feel the heat of the anger pretty quickly, and it burns pretty bad. I had a patient this week at one of my facilities that was in agonizing pain, and I called the nurse to administer Percocet to her. I watched the patient intake the medication, and then went in about two hours later, and she complained of a headache. Again, I called for...

Every aide has had scary moments on the job where they were in danger. I had never imagined when I first started my CNA course that I would ever be put in any dangerous situations. I thought it would all be very predictable and boring work. I was wrong. The first time I ever even knew we could be in danger was a patient who was 6'2'' if memory serves me right, his wife had recently died, and he was determined to die. He had quit eating and drinking as well as taking his medication, and would just lay in bed all day and night. He was refusing to shower or go to the bathroom, and changing him was a nightmare. I came into work one day with a note in the book to see the med tech before I hit the floor. I soon learned that one of our older aides had gone in his room to help him into the shower, and he was livid. She wasn't backing down and he got up, knocked her backwards where she hit the wall, grabbed an oxygen tank above his head and went after her. By a miracle our tra...